Long Day

Let me start by stating that I know these photographs aren't great. It's not the point this time.

Today was a hard day. We had my grandma's funeral. One of the hardest things to see was how sad and heartbroken my grandpa is. Although he was sad, there was a quiet strength about him, dressed in black, with red to honor his wife, whose favorite colour was red. There is a weight on his shoulders now, of looming loneliness. I know he can do it. While is in deep mourning, he is also strong. We are all his legacy, and we are with him.

I included the bottom picture because I see lots just looking at those shoulders. I see a tired man, shoulders slightly slouched. I also see strength. I see strength of a man who has farmed for decades, who helped raise 4 children, who has lived through a 57 year marriage, who has loved and lost more deeply than most will get to experience. I see the shoulders of a man who will learn to survive on his own, regardless of how lonely he may feel at times. I like my grandpa's shoulders. I hope I have half the shoulders he has some day.

Christmas

Christmas has lost its 'Merry' this year.

Love you and miss you, grandma.

I got a call on Thursday morning from my dad, telling me through shaky voice that grandma had died. We knew that her time was limited, but weren't expecting her time to come so soon. I guess essentially her kidneys shut down.

I drove home that night with Jenn. As expected, it was miserable there. Grandpa is lost right now. When Jenn hugged him, all he said was "I lost my wife". I cannot imagine the heart break of being with someone through the thick and thin for 57 years, then her being gone. He's lost. My mother and her sisters and brother are lost right now as well. My mother talked to her mother almost every day of the week, for at least a few minutes. All she wanted was to hear her voice again. That's all she wants right now. I think that's all anyone wants right now. Such is the vicious nature of death, and wanting what we can't have. It tears at the heart, brings up feelings of guilt, panic, confusion, anger, denial, and more guilt.

My grandma was only 76. She was a week and a bit short of her 77th birthday. Her birthday is on Christmas day. That day will seem a bit less bright now. I'll look to God for comfort, as I hope others will. God, in time will help make our wounds less painful. I hope Grandpa and his three daughters and son find comfort in God during this quiet and sad time.

I love you and miss you, Grandma.

Jason

Having fun

Above are a couple photos from two different quick sessions I did over the past few weeks. The top is a group of guys from the city who partook in Movember. The bottom is a friend who needed a photo for the website of her shared business. I'm really excited about learning more and improving at my skill behind a camera. Have I mentioned this before? If so, it's because I'm excited. Obviously I need to learn a LOT, and it will take time, but that's perfectly okay. Enjoy.