Day 278

I'll just get down to it.

I'm not going to tell you what I'm about to tell you for sympathy points, or even to complain. I'm telling you because that's the point of this blog...to tell you about myself, keep you updated on what's going on, and to be transparent and as genuine as possible. Anyway, enough of that.

When I was struggling with the worst of my depression this last year, and was contemplating medication but wasn't sure, I had a few wise friends ask me "if you had diabetes, wouldn't you take medication to help you get better?" Of course, I said yes, and eventually decided it would be best for my mental health to take anti-depressants.

You probably know where this is going, but I'll continue anyway.

A few months ago, I made a decision to cut out (or dramatically reduce) sugary/calorie drinks like juices, sugary pops, etc. I held to it pretty well, and I was also making an effort not to eat as much (I still struggled with eating a bit in the evenings). Anyway, the weight started to come off...10 pounds, 20 pounds, etc. I'm not sure how much I weighed when i started drinking less calories, but I think it was around 290, maybe 285. Recently I weighed myself at 258. I was pumped, to be sure.

Go back a year-ish. My family doctor, wise as he is, gave me a blood work req because I was a new patient of his, and he wanted to see how I was doing. I put that damn thing off for a year. I had the blood work done this past Saturday morning, and a message was left on my answering machine Sunday afternoon, telling me that the results were consistent with diabetes. I got in to see my doctor on a cancellation appointment, and now I'm on medication for type 2 diabetes. I don't know if it's ironic, or just a "funny" coincidence, but there you have it.

I would be lying if I said I wasn't sad and angry about this. Unfortunately, this is the inciting incident that will force me to get my act together. If I don't act on this, my health deteriorates, and, well...you know. If I do act on it, exercise and eat well, find a good balance, etc., my life could potentially be better than before I had diabetes.

For those of you who aren't aware (I hardly am yet), type two diabetes is the type without insulin needles. It's definitely the lesser of the two, but will still require diligence, hard work, and the support of my wife to manage/control it.

Like I said, I'm not looking for empathy/sympathy. Although it is genetic, it's also a lifestyle thing. How could I expect to be as overweight as I am/was, and not run the risk of developing diabetes.

Funny thing is, that I thought I was slowly getting my weight down on my own terms...but it was my condition that was making me lose weight. I guess I was never able to do it on my own. That's one frustration I have.

I'll probably talk about this more, to work it through. I hope you don't mind. Thanks for your listening (reading) ear (eyes). Love you all. Take care.